Brighton 3-0 Liverpool: Redmen cannot stop the Seagulls March

The concourses of the Amex were still packed nearly an hour after Brighton 3-0 Liverpool had finished. Drinks were being raised to Solly March and Roberto De Zerbi, although not Guinness – that had been drunk dry in the West Stand Lower along with every single pie eaten.

Then one Albion fan who may or may not have been slightly past his best turned to his friend at the front of the queue for another pint of warm, flat, terrible Fosters.

“My wife will divorce me when I am sleeping on the streets of Tirana next season… and I don’t care,” he said. Not if I am sleeping on the streets of Tirana, but when.

De Zerbi has made Seagulls supporters not only dream of Europe, but believe it is going to happen. And when you watch a performance like Brighton 3-0 Liverpool, it is hard to disagree.

Much of the focus afterwards was predictably on how bad the Redmen were. This has been a running theme since the Albion entered the Premier League, whereby whenever any of the European Super League Elite Six are beaten pundits and fans of other clubs talk about the opposition being poor.

Since Roberto De Zerbi took charge however, the analysis of weak opposition has stepped up. Liverpool might be a shadow of their former selves with Jurgen Klopp raving on the sidelines like an old woman who cannot find powdered milk in Waitrose, but they are not a terrible team.

It was Brighton being sublime that made them look terrible. So sublime in fact that between bouts of accepting inevitable divorce caused by a European tour in 2023-24, Seagulls fans were labelling this the most complete performance and result in the 122 year history of Brighton & Hove Albion Football Club.

The first half was one-way traffic flowing towards the goal of Alisson Becker. Liverpool could not get close to taking the ball off the Albion with Mo Salah and new £44 million signing Cody Gakpo barely getting a look in.

So frustrated were the Redmen by Brighton’s dominance that the normally classy Jordan Henderson put in a terrible challenge from behind on Moises Caicedo long after the Albion midfielder had moved the ball on.

Henderson was lucky to get away with only a yellow for a tackle born out of pure frustration. Hopefully, it will make Caicedo think twice about swapping the Amex for Anfield if Liverpool’s rumoured interest manifests into a future bid.

Trent Alexander-Arnold and Joel Matip also found their way into the referee’s notebook for hacking down Kaoru Mitoma.

Three first half bookings summed things up for Liverpool as they were outplayed in a way few teams ever manage, even in the current campaign with all its problems for Klopp and his players.

The only thing missing from the opening 45 minutes was a Albion goal. The closest Brighton came was when Alexander-Arnold nearly put an off target March shot into his own goal.

March also thought he had won a penalty on 42 minutes when breaking through and going to ground after he attempted to round Alisson.

Darren England pointed to the spot but VAR got involved and ruled that March had been offside, denying Alexis Mac Allister the chance to mark his homecoming following the World Cup with a successful spot kick.

All the talk at half time was about how good Brighton had been, how they only needed a goal and that how such circumstances normally transpire into a 1-0 defeat.

Anyone whose half time Amex Stadium wine or pint strayed 70 seconds into the second half heard the noise of cheers coming from the stands and assumed that with grim predictability, Liverpool had taken the lead.

This is De Zerbi’s Brighton though and we are fast having to get used to the Albion not doing what we all predict. It was in fact March who had scored.

A high press led to Adam Lallana winning possession for Brighton. Yes, Lallana had lasted more than five minutes without getting injured against Liverpool for the first time in his Seagulls career.

Lallana fed Mitoma whose run into the box and pass across goal left March with a simple tap in. Brighton led 1-0 and nobody in their right mind could argue that they did not deserve it.

If we are being honest, they probably deserved to lead by two. And that duly happened six minutes later when March scored his second of the afternoon.

Caicedo found the outstanding Evan Ferguson to lay off to March. The Albion number seven still had plenty of work to do in providing a stunning left foot finish which had Alisson grasping at air as it flew into the far corner.

March now has five goals in his past five appearances under De Zerbi having scored three in 81 matches when Glow Up Graham Potter was in charge.

De Zerbi said upon his arrival that he wanted to improve the output of March and Leandro Trossard. A penny for the thoughts of Trossard, who believes himself bigger and more important than the Albion and who spent the previous day eating an overcooked jacket potato and paying 20 cents to go for a piss at a motorway service station on the France/Belgium border.

Brighton were proving in style that they do not need their hat-trick hero from the 3-3 draw at Liverpool earlier in the season.

Trossard could quite feasibly be left to rot in the reserves over the next five months before a summer sale if the Albion so wish and are willing to accept a reduced fee compared to what his services could muster in this month’s transfer window.

Liverpool were so rattled that Klopp made a quadruple substitution, as if he were managing the Mighty Ducks and instigating a line change rather than a game of Premier League football.

The Redmen were slightly improved for the wholesale changes and Robert Sanchez had to make an excellent save from a close range Gakpo event.

Brighton put the game beyond doubt with nine minutes remaining when making it 3-0 and sparking a mass exodus of Liverpool fans.

The only way to describe the brilliant finish provided by substitute Danny Welbeck was Paul Gascoigne, England v Scotland, Wembley Stadium, Euro 96.

Dat Guy received a March pass, flicked the ball over Joe Gomez and then smashed a volley past Alisson for one of the goals of the season. It has taken nearly six months for Welbeck to open his Premier League account in 2022-23 but it was well worth the wait.

“The best supporters in the world” began streaming out at that point, leaving the away end half empty. Oh to have been a fly on the wall in the Font to see the reaction of the Brighton Kop, that group of fans who think they are Liverpool loyalists despite living 270 miles away from Merseyside and watching every game on television.

Albion fans in contrast gave their team a standing ovation at the end. 61 years to the day of their only previous home league win over Liverpool, Brighton had humiliated the Reds 3-0.

Time to explain to all those wives, husbands, fiancées, boyfriends and girlfriends out there that the Albion are going on a European tour.